WHAT DO CILANTRO, GHOSTS, A DESERTED ISLAND AND MY MOM HAVE IN COMMON?

Looky here now. I won an award y’all. Actually, if I want to get all braggity brag brag about it, I won a few awards. Thank you. Thank you. I have so many people to recognize and show my appreciation and gratitude to. (Picture me here, standing on a grand stage, wearing a flowing sparkly dress, pretty, sparkly jewelry and big poofy hair. I don’t really have poofy hair, but if I’m winning awards I need my imaginary hair to be poofy.)

I’m going to do this thing a bit whacked from how you’re technically supposed to do the Liebster Award thingy. What? I can if I want to. Yes I can. Stop arguing with me. I can. Shush.

*cue music*

It’s my blo-og and I’ll do what I waa-nt to. I’ll do what I waa-nt to. I’ll do what I waa-nt to. You would do it too if you let all your awards pile up and sucked and didn’t write a post about them and pay it forward and are trying to do it all nooooooooooow.

*Okay. Turn off the music. Let’s get on with this thing.*

I was nominated for the Liebster award by some fantastic blogger friends. Click on the names to find their pages. The Precious Princess’s guide to Bananaland. It’s why you like me. Little steps. Tried, Tested and True Mommy. You should click on them. Really. Click click click people. Good reads right there.

Rules of the Liebster Award are:

1. Tag the person or errrr….people that nominated you. Checkity check check check.
2. Answer 11 questions that they have given you.
3. List 11 random facts about yourself.
4. Nominate 11 other bloggers for the award.
5. List 11 questions for the nominees to answer.

So because I have let this award and…ahem…others….pile up, (Shut. It. I know. I know. Class A bloghole right here) I have to combine my 11 questions from all four of these lovely ladies, to answer. Which works out extremely well for me because I just get to pick 11 out of the 44 that they have given me, that I want to answer. SCORE!

Ready? Ready. Aaannnddd GO!!

1. If you could haunt someone, who would it be & why?

I would haunt my husband and my mom. My husband because it would totally freak him out. Seriously. He would flip the **** out. It makes me laugh just thinking about it. I like to laugh alive so I’m pretty sure that I would like to laugh when I’m dead. He would give me great big side ache, pee your pants laughs.
I would haunt my mom because although she might be freaked at first, she would know it was me and then it would be all good. She’d talk to me and try to feed me. She’d make my favorite snacks, leave a spot on the couch for me, turn on the TV and let me watch all my favorite shows. Although I couldn’t really eat the snacks or talk back to her, it would still be fun. I always have fun with my mom. If I die before her I hope that we can still have fun together. Mom? P.S. I’m going to haunt you.

2. If you could go back in time, what era would you visit?

Probably the 20’s. Just for the hats, the hair styles and the dresses. I know. I know. I’m a girl. What can I say?

3. What 3 things would you take on a deserted island (excluding husband and children)?

My mom. What? You didn’t say I couldn’t bring my mom. I’d bring my mom, some fabric, needles and thread. You can’t count the needles. I’d hide them in my clothes so the deserted island inspector of what you bring’er would only see my mom, fabric and thread. See? Three things. I’d be good. My mom can make anything from nothing. I’d have banana leaf dresses, kick ass palm tree hats, coconut shoes. I’d be the most stylish person ever to grace that island. A plane flying overhead would spot me in all of my fabulousness, they’d swoop down to inspect my digs and rescue us right there on the spot. Then I would be whisked away to Hollywood where I would be awarded with a Winner of Best Dressed on a Deserted Island Award. It would be awesome.

4. What is your favorite color?

Yellow. Duh. Bananas, the sun, Big Bird…All things spectacular are yellow. I just need someone to buy me a yellow corvette and my life would be complete.

5. Wine or beer?

Ummm…well? Neither. I don’t drink. Okay. Okay. I will wait here a moment while y’all wrap your head around that concept.
…
…
…
Better?
Nope. I don’t drink. Shhhh. It’ll be alright. Strange, wacky, foreign concept in our society, huh? I used to drink. It just didn’t work out so well for me, so now I don’t. It’s okay. I still eat chocolate and I have coffee. Thank God I have coffee!!

6. If you were to write a memoir, what title would you give it?

I’m fine, but my mommy has issues. A memoir in the making already, right?!!

7. If you were a Superhero, what power would you have?

Oh what an easy peasy question! I’d be able to stop time. For sure!!! Hello?!! What I could get done in a day if I could stop time!! Tired and kids are being annoying and all kid like? Stop time. Nap time. Want to write a great blog post, but don’t have the time? Stop time. Nap time. Oh. I mean blog time. The possibilities are endless.

8. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

Soooo…How’d it all turn out?

9. Do you want to go where everyone knows your name?

I ONLY go where everyone knows my name! Seriously. You’ve never heard of me? Well that’s just down right shocking! Everyone knows me!

10. Do you like birds?

No. They have the ability to poop on my head.

11. Who is your guilty pleasure music artist?

I have so many! This is a very difficult question. Nine Inch Nails? Nirvana? Smashing Pumpkins? Stone Temple Pilots? The list is endless. I’m going with my man Trent Reznor. NAILS FOR THE WIN!!

Whew! That was a lot of questions. Now I have to give you 11 random facts about myself. Hold on people. It will soon be over. I promise.

1. I hate olives.
2. I hate cilantro.
3. If somebody kidnapped me and said I either had to eat olives and cilantro or they would cut off my finger….I would eat the olives and cilantro. What? I hate ‘em, but I need my fingers yo!!
4. I had a recurring dream of being blind, until I had Oli. Never had that dream since.
5. When I was 15 I snuck out of my house, got caught, was dragged inside my house by my dad and then jumped off the balcony to escape my furious parents. I broke my leg.
6. I’m a born swimmer. In a past life I was some kind of fish.
7. I love ghosts and ghost stories. I’ve had so many experiences that I cannot deny the existence of “something else”. I don’t know exactly what it is, but I’m convinced that it’s there.
8. I was haunted by a deceased friend of mine for 2 years.
9. I dream big. I really do believe that anything is possible.
10. My husband is my soul mate. I knew it the first time I saw him.
11. Rain makes me nervous. Every time something bad has happened in my life, it has been raining. I have a love/hate relationship with it.

Okay guys, we’re almost done. Here are my 11 nominations.

1. The Momma Bear Chronicles.
2. My Thoughts on a Page.
3. Next Life, NO Kids
4. My Dance in the Rain
5. The Zookeepers Wife
6. Mama Gone Mad
7. Chopping Potatoes
8. My Life as Lucille
9. The Sadder, but Wiser Girl
10. Folk Haven
11. Super baby Faith

Next I’m supposed to give these nominees 11 questions to answer, but you know what? I’m not going to. Nope. You know why? Because I’m a rule breaker. Yep. A rule breaker and I like it. Also because my kids are whining and saying something about food and attention and other such nonsense. Kids. Psshht. Instead I’m going to just have the nominees answer the same 11 questions that I answered above. Lame. I know. What can I tell you?

Thanks again to The Precious Princess’s guide to Bananaland, It’s why you like me, Tried Tested and True Mommy and Little Steps for the award.

Muah!