Archive | 4:26 pm

Mombot Commands

9 Apr

I feel like I’m some kind of mombot running around performing preprogrammed tasks on autopilot and spewing out prerecorded commands to my husband and children. These mombot sentences can be heard several times throughout an average day in my house. I say them so often that they come out in a monotoned, digitalized voice that echo one after another.

Sometimes my recordings have a skip in them and I don’t even realized that I’ve repeated the same sentence 3 times in a row.

” Stop. Picking. Your. Nose. Stop. Picking. Your. Nose. St-st-st-o-o-o-p…P-P-P-Picking. Your. Nose…What’s. That. Smell. What’s. That. Smell. Wh-Wh-What’s. That. Smell…”

And I wonder why my children tune me out?

Here are the top 20 commands and questions that are programmed to loop throughout my day.

1. What’s that smell?
2. Stop picking your nose.
3. Go potty.
4. Eat your dinner.
5. Stop whining.
6. Stop fighting.
7. Stop yelling.
8. What’s that smell? 🙂
9. Is that poop?
10. Is that a booger?
11. Why are you crying?
12. Don’t put that in your mouth.
13. Don’t put that up your nose.
14. Go to bed.
15. Stay in your bed.
16. Go back to bed.
17. No, we can’t buy that.
18. Put your toys away.
19. I love you.
20. Did you fart?

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