10 Reasons To Give Up Newborn Hell

13 Feb

I know some mothers get really sad when they realize they are done having babies. I just want to give you some things to look forward to when you give up Newborn Hell.

1. Sleep. Oh sweet, sweet sleep. I think I forgot that word was in my vocabulary when I had babies.

2. Little purses. No more 50 lb diaper bags packed with 400 of your baby’s things and the tiniest wallet you can find crammed into the little front zipper.

3. Clean shirts. Good bye booger, throw up and drool stains!

4. Cute bras. No more nursing bras. Dear God! Could someone please make a cute nursing bra?

5. No more leaky boobs. You can now sit in the same room with another baby without checking to make sure your nursing pads haven’t shifted positions notifying everyone that you are the milk machine.

6. No more carrying enormous car seats everywhere. It was a fabulous day in my house when I sold my last child’s baby car seat. Why did I feel the need to leave her in the seat, carry it a mile through the parking lot, into the store or doctor’s office, only to lift her out and carry her on my hip and then the seat in my other hand? Why? I did though…every…single…time…

7. You can have sex again…like maybe even longer than 5 minutes. I don’t know about you, but every little sound on that baby monitor when my husband and I were…you know…. Instantly killed my mood. Oh, and the leaky boob thing didn’t help either.

8. Hot showers. You may now actually wait for the shower to heat up and stay in it long enough to get ALL of the soap out of your hair.

9. You get your living room back. Say good bye to the giant swing, exersaucer, play pen, floor play mats and bouncy seat that now dominate your living space.

10. If you’re lucky…very lucky, you may even get your sanity back. Months and months of crying, pooping, spitting up, not leaving the house and children’s music will take a toll on ones psyche. This is not a guarantee however. I am still looking for mine.

By the way…I guess I should mention that none of these actually apply to me except for the bras and the non leaky boobs because I still have Oli. The baby equipment in my house has now just been replaced with therapy equipment. That may be why I am continuing to search for my sanity;) But the bright side is I no longer have to tote a baby along for the ride!

11 Responses to “10 Reasons To Give Up Newborn Hell”

  1. Dean B February 13, 2013 at 8:43 pm #

    I actually miss it! I’m turning the big 4-0 this year and my husband and I have been discussing not to have another baby anymore (too many reasons, too old, we’re hoping to give T a really good future, good schools etc & here in England, that is very expensive, so yes also financial reasons). The first time we discussed this, I actually felt really low the next day. It almost felt like I was grieving the loss of my unborn/un-concieved babies… I know it doesn’t make sense, but it makes perfect sense to me. This matter, btw is still under “discussion”. – D

    • mommyhasissues February 13, 2013 at 8:47 pm #

      I know tons of mom who feel this way:( I guess for me, with Oli a big reason is it’s just too scary. I was terrified when I was pregnant with my last Ginger. Thank goodness it turned out well. Plus, Ginger was a HORRIBLE baby. That pretty much set my decision in stone. I’m happy with my 3. Then again I do have 3. If I only had one I would probably feel differently.

    • mommyhasissues February 13, 2013 at 8:47 pm #

      Btw…it does make sense:)

      • Dean B February 13, 2013 at 8:57 pm #

        Thanks! I tried explaining that to my husband and he couldn’t get me! =) If I could just have another (a little boy perhaps?) I’d be the happiest =(

  2. Jen McLeod February 13, 2013 at 8:45 pm #

    OMG I don’t miss the baby stage at all. Sadly, I have to return to it one day in the not too distant future. Blargh.

  3. 1tric February 13, 2013 at 10:40 pm #

    I miss those baby days every day of my life. Then the evening comes, fire, wine and a nights sleep… I’m cured!!

  4. My Dance in the Rain February 22, 2013 at 3:11 pm #

    I have to admit I miss the baby stage still BUTI am done too. I too with always have a small child in a sense but I am really enjoying letting some of the baby stuff go. It’s like you forget that you have a life before the kids and you go into motherhood mode and can’t turn it off.

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